I can't tell the difference between: squirrels and chipmunks, turtles and tortoises, a wolves and coyotes, sea cows and manatees, alligators and crocodiles, newts and salamanders, frogs and toads, dolphins and porpoises, Rays and Skates, Eels and Sea Snakes, and most of the great cats when they are colored black, like black panthers and jaguars. Can you?
For that matter, there's also Debbie Gibson and Tiffany, Equal and Sweet & Low, V for Vendetta and Z for Zorro, Cedric the Entertainer and Bernie Mac, Roseanne and Rosie, Julia Styles and Erika Christensen, Deep Impact and Armageddon, and metros and the brand-concious (esp. those that think there is a fundamental difference between Nissan & Infiniti, Toyota & Lexus, and Acura & Honda other than price).
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Monday, April 03, 2006
Chicken or Beef?
Wanna learn flight attendant-speak? Begin all your sentences with "Once again", "At this time", and "In just a few moments...". How to say chicken or beef in multiple languages? Japanese: toriniku or gyuniku, Spanish: pollo or carne, and my personal favorite, Hawaiian pidgin:"eh brah, like beef"? ...oh maybe you chicken? Be sure to try that last one in Hawaii, its a favorite joke with the locals and its a great way to show your cultural awareness and sensitivity.
So just as boarding began on my flight today, I saw this "incident" transpire right outside the aircraft. Apparently, someones luggage was dragged for about sixty feet before disintegrating enough to finally roll under the luggage cart. When I stepped onto the catering truck to get a better view, I could see the trail of shredded luggage began well behind the tail of our plane. The funniest part was that the guys standing over it were not the guilty party. That guy just kept going and perhaps didn't realize it even happened. No, these guys stopped to look at the luggage tag, and after confirming it wasn't from their cart, swept the shredded contents into a small pile with their feet as a token gesture of concern, then sped off. We had to call the captain to have someone in Ops collect it because it might be considered FOD (Foreign Object Debris) near the ingestion area of the number one engine. More importantly, no passengers had taken notice yet, and we wanted to keep it that way. Someone eventually came over with a clear garbage bag and swept everything up. Now, being there when an airline representative presents the luggage (or whats left of it) to the passenger in a clear garbage bag... priceless.
Gee, that looks just like my ba... #$@&!
So just as boarding began on my flight today, I saw this "incident" transpire right outside the aircraft. Apparently, someones luggage was dragged for about sixty feet before disintegrating enough to finally roll under the luggage cart. When I stepped onto the catering truck to get a better view, I could see the trail of shredded luggage began well behind the tail of our plane. The funniest part was that the guys standing over it were not the guilty party. That guy just kept going and perhaps didn't realize it even happened. No, these guys stopped to look at the luggage tag, and after confirming it wasn't from their cart, swept the shredded contents into a small pile with their feet as a token gesture of concern, then sped off. We had to call the captain to have someone in Ops collect it because it might be considered FOD (Foreign Object Debris) near the ingestion area of the number one engine. More importantly, no passengers had taken notice yet, and we wanted to keep it that way. Someone eventually came over with a clear garbage bag and swept everything up. Now, being there when an airline representative presents the luggage (or whats left of it) to the passenger in a clear garbage bag... priceless.
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